1.You use strange initials (C-PAP, CCs, NICU, NG) when discussing your child.
2.You actually remember how many CCs make up an ounce.
3.You count his weight in grams.
4. The skin on your hands is peeling from washing so often!
5.You hesitate when someone asks his/her age, but you know exactly how much he/she weighs!
6. The answer to “How old is your baby?” is a story 30 minutes long!
7. When someone asks his birthday, you reply, “Which one?”
8. You start to understand some of the things they say on ER!
9. You turn into Kung-Fu Mom when someone tries to touch your baby.
10. You attempt to measure just how much spit-up he/she just had before you clean it up!
11. You know how much he weighs before putting him on the scale at the doctor’s office
12. You cry at Maternity Ward and get mad at Baby Story.
13. You see a 7lb newborn and say “Wow! She’s so BIG!”
14. Your baby is months old before he can even go to the mall.
15. When someone says how tiny your baby is, you argue that he is huge — and to demonstrate, you whip out pictures of him in NICU.
16. You do a health check on people when they come to your house to visit .
17. You want to scream when someone says that she just wants to have this baby now – at week 28, 32, or 34.
18. You are so amazed when someone actually tells you your baby is big for his age!
19. You tried to find a place to buy newborn size diapers in bulk.
20. You called half your relatives when the baby grew out of their first pair of pajamas!
21. You never take your child for granted.
22. You worry about RSV season and it is still weeks away . . .
23. You know what “RSV” stands for.
24. You donate his/her tiny clothes to the NICU and marvel that they seem so small – when they were too darn large!
25. Your son gets a simple cold and her doc sees her within the hour!
26. It has taken them 5 months to grow INTO newborn clothes!
27. You pick up 2 pounds of ground beef and think that your baby was born at the same weight
28. You buy “Purell” in bulk
29. You can stare at your baby for hours when he sleeps
30. In the course of a day you have wanted to slap and bear hug the same NICU nurse.
31. The statement “breastfeeding is simple and natural” makes you laugh — or cry, depending on the day and the hour.
32. You could drive the route from your house to the hospital in your sleep… and maybe you have.
33. The sound of your baby crying is beautiful, not annoying.
34. You not only know what “bilirubin” is, you have had several extensive conversations about it.
35. You need to have another baby so you can wear all the maternity clothes you have in your closet with the tags still on them.
36. You’ve aquired a taste for hospital food.
37. You always change your baby by putting the new diaper under the old before you take it off.
38. You are very uncomfortable when you take your baby home and don’t know her heart rate, respirtation rate or o2 levels.
39. You pray for, and celebrate, poopy diapers.
40. The following 6 months, or longer, after your baby gets home, they are in the same room with you during every daily activity. Shower, bathroom, dishes laundry… dosen’t matter, cause if you can’t see them, it’s “not worth doing”.